21 Lessons From 2021
January 2022
And we’re back…
The year 2021 brought more challenges than we all anticipated. Another season on-court cut short, campaigns left unfinished, and Melbourne lockdown struck again.
With the struggles of lockdown and working from home, came a lot of time to think, perhaps too much time… so in order to prevent a downhill spiral, I, along with many others in the same boat, needed to turn this into productive thinking — set goals, change habits and reflect — once this all ends am I coming out the same person, better or worse?
This sparked a mental health cleanse, full of reflection, journaling, daly exercise, healthy eating and cutting down on bad habits. The process was definitely not easy, but most changes with rewarding outcomes are not.
So here we go again, 21 lessons learnt from a year that could have been better — NOTE: this piece of writing contains my own personal reflections, not advice — also not in any particular order.
1. “Control what you can control” — D. Round
There are probably a hundred people who have said this to hundreds of other people. But it struck home in 2011 when I was going through a rough time in the mental health space. The place I felt safe was the footy field, and that’s where I confided my challenges. I hadn’t been at the club long as part of the senior program, but the coaching staff made sure to invest in their players as people — fortunate for me, I was no exception. My assistant coach at the time gave me probably what he thought was a run-of-the-mill pep talk, which turned out to be much more than that to 17 year old boy.
I learnt to control only what I could and accept that there were many things in my life that didn’t fall into that category — hard for a 17-year old to accept, of course — 10 years later, 2021 was a grand reminder of this.
2. Change ain’t so bad after all.
Mid-way through a pandemic and Melbourne’s various lockdowns, over just a 10-day period I decided it would be a good idea to pull the trigger on a career change, complete my studies, move out of home, accept a new full-time position in an industry I knew very little about, all whilst attempting to cope with the unfortunate end of an incredible relationship — smart, right?
Piggy-backing off my previous point, being not so in control of your life for a moment isn’t all that terrible… you learn very quickly what you can control and how to adapt. Hard work doesn’t just mean getting your hands dirty, discovering who you are and what kind of person you would like to be is a hell of a task in itself, though like most things that require effort, damn rewarding.
3. Change habits, not goals.
Goal setting is tough for some, myself included. There are so many variables that can contribute to the overall outcome, many of which out of the control of ones self. Habits pave the way toward goals — “if nothing changes, nothing changes” (Courtney C. Stevens) a call back to last years reflection. With many things out of my control, the things that I can are the habits and rituals that I conduct on a daily basis. I’m in control of my actions, not those of others, so why don’t i focus on them, and whatever else will be, will be?
4. “Mentoring Up”
A term I heard of during a coaching conference a few years back, though examples of this came to light this year. Mentoring doesn’t just picture and older, wiser person giving that wisdom to a younger one. Mentoring goes both ways and can be seen in many more.
I learnt not to be afraid or feel inferior when learning from someone outside the above mould.
5. “What’s your opinion on that?”
…isn’t a rhetorical question to bring to light someone else's opinion, just to shut it down with yours. Stay humble.
6. COVID sucks.
‘Nuf said.
7. True friendship.
This year I moved out of home for the first time with my two best mates. Not to say I didn’t appreciate them before, but I don’t think I really understood true friendship until we became housemates, especially throughout COVID, and how much we leant on each other.
S. Griffin and J. West — you blokes are stars.
8. ‘Self-worth’ and prioritising yourself is a balancing act — not an excuse to turn into a selfish prick, incapable of empathy towards others.
An apt description of my troubles to find this balance. Lift yourself up, but don’t drag down others in the process.
9. “Be You 2.0” — D. Linossier
See below, couldn’t have said it better myself:
https://medium.com/@domlinossier/reflections-of-a-rookie-head-coach-c7bcfa1e252b
9. Block out the noise.
…that stops you from being you (2.0).
We are always learning and taking advice from others. Make sure to filter that information to what can make you a better you.
10. Why do you coach?
*Reader discretion advised*
This year at tryouts, I saw a young girl trying out that I hadn’t seen for about 10 years or so. She was a spitting image of her dad, who happened to be my coach for senior football, around that same time period ago.
During that time, after a premiership win, I was going through my own mental health struggles. As you can imagine, after an alcohol fuelled celebration that went on for many days, what goes up must come down. I hadn’t been home in two days, didn’t feel like I could talk to my parents, friends or teammates. I was at a dangerous point thinking unhealthy thoughts and how I could bring them into action. Then my Nokia rang — my head coach calling. Calmly concerned, he convinced me to tell him where I was. He picked me up, took me back to his family home and helped me back to a better place — coach saved my life.
It was that morning I met his daughter, no older than 5 or 6 at the time. I hadn’t seen her since then, until tryouts this year. I was beside myself. Yes, because as a 27 year old man, I felt extremely old. But also, because in that moment, I felt at peace with why I coach — if I, as a coach, can have half the effect on a young persons life that my head coach had on me, I’ve done my job and everything else is a bonus.
11. Fundamentals are fundamental.
The fancy artwork and massive TV don’t mean anything to your house if the foundations don’t allow the house to support itself. There is always time to reinforce the fundamentals of the house.
12. ‘Success’ isn’t the same for all athletes.
I found it very worthwhile to seek each athletes success criteria for their season and beyond. They ranged from “be good enough to still play in 2 years time” to “hope to play in the WNBL or higher”. Not every athlete can be coached the same, but finding common ground will allow you to coach your group as a team a lot easier.
13. “ABC — Attitude / Balance / Challenge” — 2021 Coaching Philosophy
“ABC — Attitude / Balance / Challenge / Decisions / Enjoyment” — 2022 Coaching Philosophy
This year I really started to realise how important joy was to the game of basketball. To me, the Golden State Warriors encompass this perfectly — see below.
*Outline your values and what you stand for — your team buys in to you.
14. Watching basketball is (still) a skill.
Film watching, cutting, putting back together, narrating — all of it. Video is a skill area I really need to work on.
15. Career change at 26? Worth it.
I’m glad that I became chef, I wouldn’t be who I am today without those experiences. “Well duh..”
It’s much more than that. The work ethic, ability to fight through all types of adversity, the hours, the shitty pay, the physical and mental health struggles… all horrible. But I’m thankful, no experience like life experience, right?
I love food, and the joy it brings others, but there’s no amount of money you could offer me to step back into a kitchen full time.
16. As coaches, we don’t know the answer to everything, although it seems as if we’re supposed to (most of the time).
It’s okay not to know, just add whatever that is to your list of things to learn.
17. Coaches are still human.
Sometimes we forget, as coaches ourselves. We get upset, frustrated, sad, depressed, anxious, you name it… we all struggle. Take a moment next time you find yourself being judgmental or jumping to conclusions about another coach.
18. Networking.
Another skill I need to work on, but geez it’s important. Create opportunities for yourself, opportunities won’t do it for you.
19. The MCU is unbeaten.
That is all.
20. Player attention is limited.
“Consider it a pool of money that you’ve got at the start of your session, you don’t wanna go spending it all in the first five or ten minutes and then be broke for the rest of the time having lost their attention.” — Rob Mason on the Talking Split Podcast, see below:
*Terrific analogy at 46:19
21. The Resilience Project.
Read it.
Resolution for 2022 — ‘Be Open’
This year, I’m going to challenge myself, to be open. Be open to learning new skills, try new things, be open to relationships and other peoples opinions. Be open to meeting new people and doing good for others, but not forgetting about myself. Be open to feeling comfortable in my own skin — in my own mental space and how I physically look. Be open to being better every day, but celebrating the small wins and being content how far I’ve come and excited about the journey ahead.
That’s all from me, see below info if you wish to continue the conversation on any of the above — stay safe and here’s to 2022!
Facebook — Daniel Gianchino
Twitter — @DGianchino
Email — coach.danielgianchino@gmail.com
